{"id":392,"date":"2006-06-30T15:10:35","date_gmt":"2006-06-30T19:10:35","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lopeyland.com\/?p=392"},"modified":"2006-06-30T15:10:35","modified_gmt":"2006-06-30T19:10:35","slug":"stabbing-myself","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lopeyland.com\/?p=392","title":{"rendered":"Stabbing myself"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I love to cook. I like taking recipes, adapting steps, and stretching the culinary portion of my abilities. Of course, this means that every so often, I do something kinda stupid. Like last night.<\/p>\n<p>Scenario: 8:15 p.m. Jacob had, after a no-nap day, gone to sleep. Laureen was hungry, and I had just come home from work about 30 minutes earlier.?  She said, &#8220;Food. Hot. Now.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Okay, I can deal with those parameters. So, it&#8217;s off to the kitchen to make a stoup &#8212; what Rachel Ray calls a cross between a soup and a stew. This one is pretty easy:<\/p>\n<p>2 28 oz. cans of diced tomatoes<\/p>\n<p>1 onion, chopped<\/p>\n<p>4 slices of bacon, chopped<\/p>\n<p>2 garlic cloves, minced<\/p>\n<p>1 can wax beans<\/p>\n<p>1 smidgen of frozen corn<\/p>\n<p>The time comes to put the tomatoes in the already cooked bacon and onion. So, I go to the electric can opener. It can&#8217;t get a grip on the lip of the can. Try again. Fail again. Try again, again. Fail again, again. See a pattern?<\/p>\n<p>Well, I whip out the church key (you know, that can opener that punctures cans with triangular indentations) and set to work, forsaking common sense for speed. Punch, turn, punch, turn, pun&#8211;whoops, ouch. Got my right index finger. It bled a lot, but I didn&#8217;t faint, thank goodness. The worst part was explaining to Laureen why I was late. She was very understanding, but dangit, I should have known better.<\/p>\n<p>The hope was to go to the doctor today (for a previously scheduled issue) and see if I needed stitches. However, any emergency with my doctor throws her schedule into complete chaos, and another appointment prevented me from seeing her. So, based on what it looks like, I think I&#8217;ll be okay. Think is the operative word there. I wish I&#8217;d thought earlier.<\/p>\n<p>The food was pretty good, however.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I love to cook. I like taking recipes, adapting steps, and stretching the culinary portion of my abilities. Of course, this means that every so often, I do something kinda stupid. Like last night. Scenario: 8:15 p.m. Jacob had, after a no-nap day, gone to sleep. Laureen was hungry, and I had just come home &hellip; <\/p>\n<p class=\"link-more\"><a href=\"https:\/\/lopeyland.com\/?p=392\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;Stabbing myself&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-392","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-health","entry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lopeyland.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/392","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lopeyland.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lopeyland.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lopeyland.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lopeyland.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=392"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/lopeyland.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/392\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lopeyland.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=392"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lopeyland.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=392"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lopeyland.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=392"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}